Tuesday, December 07, 2004

No sleep till Belfast

Well another freaking bad night's sleep. Other night was allergies this time it was just worrying about this and that. Work stuff, obsessing over car stuff. Same shit. Why can't I just let things go and get to sleep.

taking a pill for sure tonight and going to bed right after the kids go to bed.

got to sleep again right around 5am, right when the Kids wake up for the first time, then are up for good around 6:30-7.

Wife was at gym. just couldn't deal with it. Little one has been a royal pain in the ass for weeks. get upset because I gave his cup to the older one. I freaked, threw the glasses in the sink, sprayed milk all over the blinds.

Like a complete lunatic I run into the adjacent play room and am screaming at the top of my lungs and jumping up and down. Just microns away from picking toys up and hurling them through the window.

All in front of my kids

Funny now, yeah. Right out of a movie. Scary then. Me, normal regular joe nicest guy in the world freaking like a maniac.

gotta keep it together.

I'm just so out of it now, light headed from coffee. hands shaking. don't even want to ride or do anything. I've got to watch the kids tonight while wife goes out for Mom's Night out. joy.

Strength phase is down, now onto power

2 weeks, lift twice a week, and do sprints and easy riding.

Hate sprints

need to get work on my gears, always worried I'm going to really stand on it and the gears are going to slip and down I go.



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